The response all of you have given to me is so overwhelming! I did not think I would be getting 60 plus views a day. Of course, none of this would have been possible without you, my readers.
Please share your comments with me, and tell me what you like and do not like. Also tell me what you want to know about!
When I visited Pakistan in Winter of 2011, I did not realize that there was something I was subconsciously picking up on. In fact, it did not occur to me until I landed at San Francisco International Airport. Coming off the plane, at the end bridge (the thing that connects the gate to the plane) I saw a cheerful looking Asian man just smiling at me. Yes you read that right, smiling at me for no reason. Now I know it sounds creepy, but I was so happy, I beamed right back. Most of you probably thinks that this is no big deal; however, most of you have not visited a country where people make a habit of scowling. They seem to be offended if someone is smiling at them for no reason. Weird, right?
Coming back in September of 2012, I was aware that the Pakistani public is seriously lacking in smiles. For a while, I smiled around like an idiot. All it got me was the stink eye from many women, and dirty looks from the men. I was an anomaly to them. A girl wearing a hijab who smiled for no reason. The Pakistani impression of the hijab is usually a reserved and conservative, quiet girl or woman. Definitely not one who smiles for no reason. I am the furthest thing one could be from quiet and conservative. I like to think of myself as a modern-day Muslim who lives just as much in Deen (Faith) as in Duniya (World). At first it irked me, I wondered why they couldn't just get on with their lives and not stare me down. Then it occurred to me that I should be who I am and not care much for their looks and eyes.
All said and done, I now know that Pakistani do not have an established culture of smiling at strangers. Maybe that only exists in California. I still smile at all the strangers. Once in a while, I get a smile back. Though, I still rarely see anyone just randomly smiling. In the end, I have more California culture in me than Pakistani culture. If being completely Pakistani means I can't be cheerful, then I'm content being a Californian. Not to mention being a mystery always has a certain charm to it.
Sorry for the delayed post. This was meant to be up last night, but unfortunately, the entire nation was without power last night. Yes, you read that right, the whole of Pakistan lost power at about 11:30 PM and came back up at around 4 AM. I hear most of Pakistan is still without power, but I have not been able to confirm with sources. I am sure it's another one of those fails that the Pakistani government probably doesn't want much said about. Anyway, thank goodness I am in Islamabad because even those five hours without power were intolerable and anxiety inducing. I have become used to the scheduled daily blackouts, but imagine a whole country without power. Unfathomable in today's day and age. That is a topic for another time. I will at some point write about Pakistan's electricity problem. As soon as I better understand it. UPDATE: Just heard the news after typing all of that. It was some sort of technical glitch that caused the power to go out. Power has been restored to the country and scheduled blackouts are back on. The national language of Pakistan is Urdu. However, most Pakistanis avoid speaking Urdu as though if it were the plague (forget speaking provincial languages). There is a desire for everyone to either speak English or learn it. All of this is fine. I believe one should be at least bilingual if not multilingual. However avoidance of one's national tongue (to the point of speaking broken, nonsensical English) is absurd. Just because a native English speaker learns French does not mean they avoid speaking English and only speak French. Well that happens to be the case here. Speaking English is a sort of status symbol it seems, because it indicates academic superiority (or allows one to feign academic superiority). There is nothing wrong with flaunting one's education, but there is everything wrong with forgetting one's identity. Why are Pakistanis intent on denying their "Pakistaniness?" Where will this attitude get them? In the midst of these English-speaking Pakistanis, I cannot contain my laughter. They cannot get their grammar correct or use the correct proverbs, but for fear of their self created reputation, they will not defer to speaking in Urdu. I can provide a never ending list of examples, some I have heard myself and others have been relayed to me. Most of these bloopers are a cause for late night laughter among my siblings and I (all of who are living the American Pakistani in Pakistan life). Yesterday evening I heard a woman saying her "heart goes out" when she sees all the children on stage during a rendition of "The Sound of Music," performed by a local school. I know she meant to say that her "heart melts," but she conveyed sympathy where she meant to convey admiration. You would be even more surprised to hear that this woman is the principal of a well reputed academic institution. Similarly, the founder of another school was reported to have said "the childrens" of his school. The list could go on for an eternity. I am not even going to open the Pandora's box of individuals trying to use American or British slang while using their practiced accents to speak English. At the end of the day, I can overlook all of these flaws, but negation of one's heritage is unforgivable. Why are Pakistanis running away from being Pakistani? I don't know either.
In the motherland (Pakistan), everyday is a day of firsts. I see something new everyday. Some things are more serious than others while others seem straight out of an American sitcom about South Asia. It is truly a place of building memories.
Who knew there were such things as "dancing" horses? I saw a horse dancing to the beat of a dhol (a two-sided drum covered in cow hide and beat using to J shaped sticks) at a wedding. More like while I was spying on the neighbor's son's wedding from my rooftop. I knew weddings in Pakistan were a festive affair, but dancing horses are news to me. I'd heard of it from my parents; but what they say is true, seeing is believing. It was a truly magnificent sight; although now I wonder whether it would be considered animal cruelty (that is a whole other can of worms). Though I can try, I cannot fully explain the beauty of such a beast dancing with absolute grace. So for informative purposes, I'll share a video. Naturally the video wasn't made by me, because a spy with a video camera is not so much a spy at all. ;)
Okay so here is a clip that I got off YouTube. It's not recorded by me and I don't have any rights to this clip.
Most animal rights' activists probably cry when seeing such videos, and so before writing this blog post I did some research on "horse dancing" and discovered that the movements that the horses do with their feet is actually called a piaffe. It is a very natural action for the horse. The only training and/or "art" is getting the horse to do this on command. Now I cannot say whether these horses are beaten into doing what their trainers want. The horses that I saw and the horse in this video seem very healthy to me. But then again, I am not an expert. All in all, I am not speaking against or in favor of this practice. Just sharing a different culture with my readers.
Moving on to the rat killing. Just a small blurb. Today I saw a rat being killed (well not saw more like heard), a completely hilarious adventure. My great-grandparents driver and my mother's maid spent an hour trying to kill the rat. It was hilarious to say the least.
On the topic of domestic help, it is very common for most middle class and upper middle class families in Pakistan to have domestic help or what they call "servants." However, that also is another can of worms and one I PROMISE to shed light on soon.
In the depth of our hearts and minds, we all know that money and influence can take us very far in life. However, at the surface, we all still carry a fear of authority and a respect of the law. We know that there are certain rules we must follow. There is an understanding that criminal activity will be followed up with severe consequences.
We also know that lack of studying will result in failed classes and lack of work ethic will result in poverty.
What happens when this paranoia of consequences disappears?
Let me tell you.
This is the phenomena in present day Pakistan. In most of the civilized world, there is a fear of law in the hearts and minds of citizens. There is also a RESPECT for the law. In Pakistan, I see neither.
All sorts of crimes, even crimes against humanity, run rampant in this nation. From the driver who drives in two lanes at once to the teenager who kills a peer and can flee the country. This is Pakistan.
Corruption and bribery are such common knowledge that even I, a law abiding citizen, do not fear the law in Pakistan. For the last six months, I have wondered why?
Professors report that their students are being passed classes using bribery. Children drive cars without licenses. Poverty stricken children are working in the homes of wealthy Pakistanis and being mentally and physically abused. Murders are as common as the flu, and people get kidnapped everyday. Yet no one gets punished. The professors go on teaching. The children keep on driving. And the poor continue to suffer.
It goes to show that corruption trickles into the roots of a society. A corrupt government will lead to a nation where even the lowest rungs of society will be corrupt. Lawlessness will run rampant. The oppressed will become further oppressed. The rich will continue to become richer and more invincible. All the while, the common man will live his life in fear. Fearing the poor, who might rob him just for a morsel of bread. Fearing the rich, who may hurt his family and face no consequence.
What separates Pakistan and Pakistani people from animals?
Being myself is perhaps the hardest thing I have ever been
asked to do. Life has often put me in situations that required me to be greater
and wiser than I had ever thought I would be. And it tests me now as I reveal
my story to you. Or maybe I’ll just start with my present.
My
current predicament has brought me back to the country of my birth, Pakistan,
from my adopted country, the United States. It has been challenging to say the
least. As a 21 year old in the midst of inner turmoil, Pakistan has presented
to me a challenge of its very own. Perhaps a challenge that was not so
necessary at my life in this point.
Right
before departing for Pakistan in September, I made the decision to revert back
to being a Muslim. Don’t get me wrong, I was born a Muslim, but I never
practiced. Muslim was my label, not my being. In August, something within me
changed and I reverted. I adopted the hijab and slowly began the process of
learning my religion. I dealt with the stigmas of being a hijabi in America. I
have to say it was not too hard.
As I
was getting settled in to my new image, life brought me to the capitol of
Pakistan. My initial reaction was that learning my religion would be easier in
Pakistan. Considering it is the
Islamic Republic of Pakistan. But after arriving in Pakistan, I realized that
there was neither religion here nor any signs of a republic. It turned out to
be a land on the verge of anarchy; where the law can be manipulated to suit
one’s desires.
This
blog details my story of finding myself in a land that is more confused than I
am.
